Do you ever listen to negative opinions of people around you or even self-sabatoging thoughts you tell yourself? Well, you need to stop doing that. There is absolutely no reason at all in the world that negativity should outshine positivity. That false narratives should take precedence over positive narratives.

Those narratives that people make about you are only that…just narratives. Not truth. Not fact. But opinions. Feelings. Hurtful words to pull you down and prevent you from getting up. To keep you down. They are their narratives, not your narratives. They own them, not you.

Have you ever heard the phrase “what they are saying about you is only a reflection of themselves”? That is the same thing here. Their narrative of you, is only a reflection of who they are, not who you are.

I will never understand why people wish to degrade others, for whatever reason. But it hurts. I know it does. I too have lived where others had a narrative of me, that really only showed who they really are. I once heard someone say, “Hurting people hurt people”. Let that soak in. It’s true isn’t it. Whatever you do, don’t take your hurt out on others by creating a narrative about them to hurt them, because you are hurting. It only hurts you in the end.

What about those narratives that you tell yourself? Narratives that are self-sabotaging? Do they stem from what others have said about you that caused you to think that? Do you really believe those narratives you tell yourself? Look at the source of who is saying it, and what is their source of motivation for narrative.

To begin to comb through all the narratives to find what the truth really is… you have to to ask yourself a few questions first:

1. Who is this narrative coming from?
2. Taking my emotions out of the situation completely, is what they are saying actually factual? Is it really true, or is it just an opinion?

It is so important to set aside your emotions at this point and just cull out what is not actually factual. For example, if someone says “You’re a horrible person”. That is very hurtful. But is it actually factual? Do you have facts to back that up? Are you in fact a horrible person? Probably not. This is just someone’s opinion. Someone’s emotions that has formed their opinion, probably because you didn’t satisfy something for them that they wanted or expected.

I have dealt with false narratives from a few others in my adult life that almost broke me. If I had let it completely break me, I probably wouldn’t be here. What I am about to say, you need to read again to let it soak in: If someone hates you bad enough, they will never stop hating you and their narrative of you will never change. Accept that and never allow their narrative of you to break you. It is theirs, not yours.

So the ultimate goal is to learn to stop listening to false narratives, but how do we do that?

1. First you must become aware of the source of the narrative.
2. Change your thoughts about the narrative by asking yourself if the narrative is based on facts or just opinions or feelings? Is it true? Then once you realize it isn’t true and factual, find thoughts that are true and replace those false narratives with true narratives.
3. Adjust your mindset over the long haul. When you put the first 2 into practice on a daily basis or instance basis as situations arise, your mindset changes over the longterm. Keep putting in positive thoughts, positive goals, positive habits, positive people, positive words into your life, and you will find that those things will squash out the false narratives over time.

I hope this helps someone today. This post is a lot more serious of a post than I normally write, but there are a lot of narratives out there that people create every day. It’s important we learn to get in front of them, and be prepared, for if we are ever faced with them. Sometimes even the closest of people can hurt us. Protect your heart, mind, and soul. You are important. Then say a prayer for those creating the false narratives of you. And pray that you don’t create any yourself, of others. None of us are perfect, and we are all susceptible. Choose love.